advice to my daughter...part deux

For the teenage years...

Don't listen to what your friends think. Think for yourself. Make mistakes and learn from them. Don't break curfew because in doing that, you will break my trust and it will take some time to rebuild.

Study hard and don't skip classes, unless it's to go to Great Adventure with your friends once a year; those memories will mean more to you than the punishment you will serve for it.

If you're going to drink, don't drive. Call me anytime, anywhere and I'll be there without judgment.

Put all of yourself into everything you do, even if you hate it. Apply to lots of colleges. Don't follow your friends or what is safe. Do what you want, even if it scares the hell out of you.

No one is better than you and you are better than no one else. If a boy breaks your heart, tell your brother. He'll kick their ass. If a girl breaks your heart, tell me. I'll kick her ass.

Spend your money for stupid things, like a car or new clothes because one day, you'll have bills and wish you were more free when you didn't.

Don't worry about the popular crowd. They're usually insecure and will grow up being assholes. Be nice to everyone, even the "weird" kids. Often, they will end up being the most loyal friends and interesting people.

Call your grandmother.

For the college years...

Be your own white knight. Don't wait for anyone to rescue you. Live on your own just once, even if it is only for a few months.

Travel and take every opportunity presented to you to do so. Be proud of who you are and never make excuses. Don't drink and drive.

Love your body. It is only young once. Take care of it.

Work hard in your career and in your family. Marry a person who isn't afraid of your independence, but supports it with his or her own. Don't marry if you don't want to. Have children and love them so much it hurts because only then will you know the true breadth of existence.

Save some money but don't worry so much about it. No one's headstone ever read: Had lots of money in the bank.

Be a good friend. Call people back. Hang out with your brother and get your families together often. If you move away from home, come back at least twice a year. The roots are the strongest part of a tree.

Laugh a lot and love hard. Nurse a broken heart with expensive vodka and ice cream.

Call your grandmother.